Tag: Fear

Anarchy, Definitions, and Parallels to Continuous Delivery

Anarchy, Definitions, and Parallels to Continuous Delivery

We’ve talked about Anarchy before, in part how it’s an incomplete “plan” for a political system. Twitter is sort of a hub of conversation regarding Anarchism and Libertarianism, and there have been some increasingly interesting arguments there lately, with people making some of those same points and arguing about what Anarchists actually want as an ideal state.

You can see one example in this thread:

https://twitter.com/Wesley_Gest/status/1386402544591724547?s=20

The argument can mostly be summarized like this:

Nice little farm - 9GAG
L: Except I don’t want chickens, because I’m allergic to feathers…

The general perception of Anarchists is that they want cities to burn, that they just want to do damage for the sake of doing damage. Anarchists say, over and over, “no, will you just listen” but a lot of people seem to be terrified of a lack of control. And when Anarchists show up and say they don’t want to be controlled and they don’t think that control is the right answer, it’s massively triggering for those people. When people are terrified, they don’t really listen so good…

Ace is one of our favorites on Twitter.

We thought this was great, and important, (and Ace is really good with words in general), but…incomplete. It covers the interaction pieces, or what it looks like to behave as an Anarchist, but we think it’s important to talk about the fact that it starts with accepting something about yourself, and what that acceptance means for the world around you.

Anarchism, to us, is a consistency of feeling and related action:

  1. You do not agree that you yourself need to be controlled, and/or you do not accept others’ control of you.
  2. You have no desire to control others, finding that repugnant and morally wrong. As such, you do not use any kind of coercion (including manipulation) to dominate others to your will.
  3. You resist and speak out against systems of control applied to people by other people.

That’s…it. No fire-throwing, no building-looting, no Molotov-cocktail wielding manifestos. Anarchism is, instead, the confluence of “I don’t deserve to be controlled” and the Golden Rule.

Anarchism is the confluence of “I don’t deserve to be controlled” and the Golden Rule.

We think people who want to steal and burn and smash just like to hide behind “Anarchy” instead of admitting that they are hateful, or really angry, and want to break stuff. Which we get, really, but could you process your feels before acting please?

What An Anarchist Utopia Looks Like by kickassia - Meme Center

If there was no government law against rioting, would you go out and burn down your neighbor’s buildings and businesses? If there were no government laws against doing heroin, would you go out and do heroin? No? Neither would we. Anarchists are mostly against the government’s tremendously violent history, and we just want to make moral laws consistent with state laws: states shouldn’t have the power to harm, jail, and murder people “legally”. We find that to be immoral. Unfortunately, a sober viewing of history shows that that is what all states do.

This is why we are Anarchists.

Continuous Delivery

We talked about how Libertarianism has a lot of overlap, conceptually, with DevOps (link). While talking about this post, we made an additional connection between Anarchism and Continuous Delivery.

One of the things we discuss in our talks is that Continuous Delivery can just…happen when you get enough barriers, bumps, and blockades out of the way of software delivery. Basically, if you remove enough pain points and things in the way, continuous delivery will just happen because developers want to write code/solve problems/deliver on technical business objectives.

Comparatively, to Anarchist good – focus on the fact that someone controlling you is fundamentally wrong, and…if you’re consistent there, you will treat others the same way.

If you focus on the fact that someone controlling you is fundamentally wrong, and you behave consistently with that conclusion, you will treat others the same way.

Remove control and fear about software delivery -> Continuous Delivery.

Remove control and fear in personal interactions -> Anarchy.

Anarchist Jokes

 

God Words, and Love

We’ll leave you with this, that Josh posted:

LP and Chill: It’ll Be Just Fine – the Short Version

LP and Chill: It’ll Be Just Fine – the Short Version

Sometimes we see a pattern, and we try to explain it, and…we end up looking like this crazy conspiracy theory guy. Not because what we’re saying is far-fetched, more because it’s so interconnected and there are so many examples and we care about it so so much that it’s hard to be clear about the points we’re trying to make. More than once, this has pointed us at toward the full explanation of the pattern ending up a longer-form piece of content – like a talk, or “maybe some day a book,” or…we don’t really know. Just..some stuff is too long or too complex for a blog, despite that being where we usually start when we want to talk about something outside of the context of “work stuff.”

Sometimes, though, we find that we can do a summary, or a short(er?) version, of the explanation of the pattern. We’ve been seeing, and writing, more about politics lately, especially the Libertarian Party (LP), because the crazy of the world has led us both to open our eyes about it. And…there are reasons that we think politics might be part of the overall answer, and that is the pattern we want to talk about.

There is a Culture War

Are you happy with the United States political system? This question is not, are you happy in relation to what came before, or are you happy ish, but are you really, truly happy about the people in charge of making, enforcing, and talking about the policies that affect your personal freedoms every day?

If you’re not happy with it, do you feel comfortable talking about that? Do you think that your friends and loved ones and coworkers and various other tribes will still accept you if you’re honest about the problems you see and how those problems make you sad, or hopeless, or angry? Because…we aren’t happy with the current system. And our comfort with talking about that varies, but…most of the people Laine at least interacts with on a daily basis just seem really happy that Not Trump is president.

The fact that the current state is depressing, and frustrating, and that we can’t talk about that without alienating ourselves, is a sign of a large-scale, many-factioned culture war. The Corpo State/Cathedral, the Woke, the Karens, the Conservative Christians, the Antifa’ers, the BLM’ers, the Thin Blue Liners… this isn’t even all of the factions, but all of these groups seem to exist primarily to tell people that saying or feeling something that the group doesn’t approve of makes that person a terrible human being who deserves to be dehumanized and disregarded.

[The factions] seem to exist primarily to tell people that saying or feeling something the group doesn’t approve of makes that person a terrible human being who deserves to be dehumanized and disregarded.

COVID has been a mess, and has added the Masker, Vaxxer, Anti-Vaxxer, Lockdowner, and Anti-Lockdowner factions. What is irrefutable is that the lockdowns that were supposed to keep us all safe have caused mental health crises, increased suicides, increased incidences of abuse, and business closures, with no end in sight because we have no coherent metrics for when it will be “safe enough” to go back, or forward, to some semblance of normal.

It Sucks

The culture war, that is. It sucks to be hopeless, and to be too afraid to talk about it. And with that many factions constantly sniping at each other, sometimes the hopelessness and the fear seem…legit.

It Leads to Actual Life-Threatening Conflict/War

In addition to leading people to live in fear, this culture war leads to actual war, if we use the “life-threatening conflict” definition of war. The government is willing to use force and violence to enforce whatever it thinks is important, mostly in the form of the police, although sometimes with agencies like the ATF. There are historical events, like Waco, and also current events, like insurrection and riots in Minnesota and on the west coast just this week. People think that the police are the bad guys for all the damage they do, and while an argument could be made that they’re choosing to enforce laws that are non-sensical and damaging, it definitely seems true that they’ve been handed an impossible task that will see them also getting hurt in the process.

People think that police are the bad guys for all the damage they do…but it seems true that they’ve been handed an impossible task that will see them also getting hurt in the process.

Some People Love the Culture War…

On the other hand, this culture war is great for some people. It distracts most of the American public from noticing that their freedoms are being slowly leeched away in the name of “safety.” It also helps people in positions of authority further cement those positions because they can position themselves as the saviors of humanity – or, they can use fear and intimidation to get compliance if not support.

The culture war also gives the people who are happily part of those factions a way to convince themselves that they’re right – they can simply be louder, and look around to see the people who are nodding in agreement, and then temporarily feel safety in numbers. The people nodding in agreement, even if they aren’t quite sure, can also find some feeling of safety because they aren’t currently being rejected by the people around them.

…because Control and “Safety”

All of these reasons to love the culture war are about control, and “safety.” People in positions of authority are trying to control everyone else into either being safe or making them feel safe, if they get some personal value out of being “in charge.” The loudest members of the factions are trying to control the people around them into making them feel like their opinions are right, and that those opinions will keep that group safe even if everyone else is screwed. And the people nodding in agreement are hiding – trying to control the people around them into not rejecting them, or kicking them out of the tribe.

But…we know, because of a lot of science, that control doesn’t work. Not at all, and definitely not long term. The problem is that people are terrified of the potential consequences of both not controlling and not being controlled.

But…You Have a Choice

The thing is…you don’t have to control other people. And you don’t have to accept being controlled. You have a choice. It may not be an easy choice, and it may lead to some of your relationships altering, or ending. But actually, you can just…process the fear of the potential consequences without changing anything. Processing the fear allows you to see reality more clearly, and to see that trying to control other people is never okay – which means that it isn’t okay for someone to try to control you, either.

You can just choose to process the fear instead of grabbing for control.

If, once you process your fear, you want to change something, then…comes the hard part. Learning how to give up control isn’t easy, and it’s scary, and it requires trust in something outside of yourself.

People

You actually can have some amount of faith in people, or in humanity as a whole. People do wonderful, beautiful things, and their capacity for good is often staggering. We said at the beginning on this post, “there are reasons that we think politics might be part of the overall answer, and that is the pattern we want to talk about.” The Libertarian party has seen an upswing this past year, for…reasons that may at this point be kind of obvious. And it’s not perfect, and actually we’re both more Anarchist than Libertarian by the strictest definition – but the Libertarian party has several voices who are saying, loudly and clearly and well, that personal freedom matters. That people matter. More than the government, more than rules, more than checkboxes and false safety. And they’re building communities and actively trying to make change to reflect that people matter at all levels.

God

…but faith in people alone isn’t enough. Both Josh and Laine genuinely have no idea how people learn to give up control without faith in something outside of themselves and outside of other people. We can very clearly see that all of this weirdness, and all of this unrest, and even the culture war itself, is God doin’ stuff. We have no idea what he’s doing, but if he’s doing stuff, he has a plan, and if he has a plan, it’s going to be awesome

There are no end states in life, which means that while things can never be completely safe, they also can never be completely broken and hopeless. And while the culture war sucks, it’s actually…okay. It’s growing pains, toward the next thing.

On Bullies

On Bullies

First, some history (and context!) from Laine…

I was overweight as a kid. Actually, I was overweight until I was in my mid-twenties, and then again for a while after I had my kids. But as a kid, in the 90s, it was an offense punishable by social ostracization. I was picked on throughout elementary school, to the point where I started calling myself fat so that other people wouldn’t do it first.

I moved at the end of 6th grade, to a much larger school. They mostly didn’t bully me for being overweight, but they did bully me for making out with my (female) best friend – which I did not, not that that matters aside from pissing me off even MORE about the sheer unfairness of it. I moved again at the end of 8th grade, to a smaller school, and found friends, and slipped into blessed nerd + “I’m in the school musical every year” semi-obscurity.

I dealt with one bully as a young adult, after I started my first job. I can see, looking back on it, that he probably felt threatened because, a) I was good at my job, b) I was on “his” project, and c) he perhaps felt like I was overstepping.

And then…no bullies. For a long time.

And then…more bullies showed up.

We’ve written about pieces of what happened at the church we were both members of. We have not written about what happened where we were formerly employed, out of (probably legitimate) fear of retaliation of some kind. But…suffice it to say that we’ve both run into a lot of bullies over the past few years. People we worked with, people we trusted. People we loved.

We try to explain a lot of patterns here. Patterns about fear and faith and hope and love, and how all of that comes together and applies to being a person. Patterns about how all of that scales to relationships (especially with God), and how it scales to and for organizations. A lot of these patterns, we figured out because…we lived them. We ran into really scared people trying to control what we did – and getting very very angry when we said no. That’s it. Just… no. We didn’t say, “you have to do what I say,” or “I’m going to make your life miserable for trying to tell me what to do.” Mostly we said, “please stop hurting us,” and “why are you trying to make me do something that I am sure is wrong?” and then eventually, just… no.

Sometimes “no” is a revolutionary act.

Decisions must be made…

Laine initially drafted this post in September of 2020. That’s actually the opposite of our usual process, typically we talk about things until it seems draft-able, then Josh does the initial draft. But this post began because Laine ran into a (comparatively mild) bully at work. And it brought back a lot of feelings about the other bullies we’ve recently run into, and a lot of sheer…exhaustion.

And then the election happened, and that brought with it more related feelings, and more exhaustion. And both the minor work bully and the election brought with them some clarity around what happens with bullies.

Bully (n): someone who does willful, targeted damage to other people in an effort to control them.

Because…bullies seem to win. The world actually seems to be structured for bullies – and for the control of other people. If you choose not to control other people, if you don’t play that game, if you flat-out refuse to play that game, then…you are an outlier. You stand out. You seem to invite bullies to take shots at you. But…that isn’t quite what happens.

Simply by existing, by living your life without controlling other people, you show the people around you that they too could choose not to control. You demonstrate, clearly, that another choice, a different choice, exists. This has the effect of forcing the bullies around you to choose if they will continue to bully – because some people behave this way because they don’t know another choice exists.

Bullies also force you to make a choice. Bullies force you to choose if you’re going to a) hide who you are in order to avoid the damage they might do, or b) very deliberately NOT hide, but instead choose that any damage is worth being yourself. As best as we’ve been able to figure out, bullies bully because they’re afraid they’re going to lose something that they think keeps them safe. Bullies need to control what they think keeps them safe so much that the people “in the way” become…dispensable.

So…if you’re the target of a bully, if you feel like your very existence invites bullies to take shots at you, then…that means that you’ve stumbled into the thing that they’re trying to hide away from the world – the thing they’re afraid they’ll lose. And it means that they don’t much like the fact that people exist who can’t be controlled into supporting their fears, and it means that they’re afraid that perhaps none of it was necessary at all.

It’s not your fault.

We’re going to say that one more time. It’s not. your. fault. We are emphasizing this because, again, it took us a long time to understand and accept it.

Mostly, with this post, we wanted to make something very clear – adult bullies exist. They exist anywhere that people exist, because people get scared, and sometimes those scared people end up with some kind of authority – real or imagined – over you and your life. This can be your boss, or your religious leader, or your government, or your significant other. Sometimes these people get SO scared that they forget entirely that you’re a person, and they just…want you to stop whatever you’re doing that seems to be a threat to them.

Regardless of what they say, it isn’t your fault. Bullies will tell you that it is, because they’re trying to convince you to change, and to hide, so that they feel more safe. You don’t have to do that. It’s scary not to, but…it is your choice. You can say no, and you can choose to be who you really are even if the bullies of the world don’t like it.

Sometimes “no” is a revolutionary act.

You won’t be alone.

The more we sort of…lean into this plan, the “be you and have fun” plan, the more we find other people who have figured this out. These people are some of the most truly supportive relationships that we have. So…while saying no to the bullies in your life, and choosing to be yourself, seems scary and like you’ll definitely be alone… you won’t. You will find your tribe, your people, your chosen family, and you will thrive. It’s worth it.

Content-Generating Machine – or, A Love Letter to Creating

Content-Generating Machine – or, A Love Letter to Creating

We’re generally good at generating content. We have been as long as we’ve been working together, it was one of the first amazing things we noticed when working as a team. Other people dread putting together a presentation, or writing up a blurb for a document, or crafting an email to get the right message across – we don’t really have problems with that. No big deal, nonchalant shrug.

We commonly refer to this ability we have as a “content-generating machine.” We can – and have! thanks, you-know-who-you-are and your content smashing emergencies – knock out 90 minute presentations in a few hours. Have something to say, put it down, and polish it until it’s beautiful. It helps that we talk about our content between the two of us, for a long time, before we get to the point of putting (metaphorical) pen to paper, but…still. It’s cool, this magical ability that we possess.

…unfortunately for this narrative, we haven’t published anything here in a long time, with the notable and exciting (to us!) exception of last week. That’s because having something to say isn’t enough. You have to have enough soul – perhaps more precisely soul energy – to create. And you have to have even more soul to share what you create in a public place. Take enough soul damage and…it gets progressively more difficult to share.

Having something to say isn’t enough – take enough soul damage, and it’s hard to share.

Creation, and Soul Bruises

I would follow the trail of this fabulous squirrel ANY-DAMN-WHERE. – L.

Creation requires soul because creation comes from the soul – any kind of creation. Writing (fiction or non-fiction), composing (lyrics or music), drawing, painting, sculpting, building, dancing… the best creative things are outpourings of our souls and their many many moods and feels. Creation is you – the core you that wants to be known and understood and also is super afraid of being alone because of who you really are.

Writing, at least the non-fiction kind that we do, takes thoughts that typically start as impressions and pictures and patterns that we see, and puts them into words in a sentence, and then a paragraph, and eventually an arc of something that’s hopefully interesting and ideally somehow meaningfully true for our audience. It requires paying attention to those thoughts, and weaving them into something that’s linear and logical. It also requires remembering the things that we wanted to talk about that were related, and knowing what’s a finite unit of “blog” or “talk” and what’s maybe a, uh, squirrel trail.

Writing, creating in general, also requires accepting that the thoughts you have, or the soul that you want to share, is worth something – that it’s worth the work of getting it out of your head at all, and also that it’s worth sharing. It takes love, and creativity, and storytelling, and vulnerability. And…if you’re as soul-bruised as we were at various points in the past year or so, well…souls can’t create if they’re beat up too badly. Not easily, anyway.

Creation, and Soul Healing

“The opposite of war isn’t peace – it’s creation.” (La Vie Boheme B, Rent)

The problem with creation requiring a healthy(ish) soul is that creation itself lets you heal. It lets you process your feels, and tell your story. Creation lets you heal the bruises and cuts and scrapes on your soul.

But the great thing about creating is that sometimes, the things that are created have the magical impact of helping other people heal, and process. And when you’re too soul-bruised to create yourself, you can heal in perhaps a less direct way than, say…sharing your soul on a blog.

Maybe it comes from switching to a more private kind of creating, or a different kind. Maybe you find other people’s songs that fit exactly what you’re going through, or maybe other people’s stories tie directly to your experiences – writing them, or reliving them by way of a great author.

Basically, you can heal, and grow, via creating, yes – but you can also heal, and grow, via experiencing other people’s creations.

How to Get Back to Creating

It’s okay. It will happen. 

That’s a thing that Laine worries about, a lot, whether her soul will…well, repair (no pun intended, hahaha) enough to have the capacity to create again. That worry is almost certainly a relic of 30+ years of untreated ADHD and feeling like getting her brain to DO the thing was a constant battle.

But…the fact is, it always comes back. When enough has healed, and enough time has passed for some brave to build back up, the drive to create always reappears. Not being alone, literally, helps a lot – as in, creating with someone else and getting that built in support and shared brave.

Be you, and have fun.

When you find you can create, when there’s enough room in your soul to be that core you again, it will just…flow. Your mind and your soul will line up, and everything just…knows what ideas connect where, like building up a Lego wall. If you can heal the damage, and you can get past the critics in your own head, and just… be you and have fun, creation is a wildly strong source of joy. You can let yourself be yourself, and worry about if it exactly “makes sense” or is “valid” later.

If you’re not bruised, beaten, scared of rejection, or simply tired, then creations just…appear out of nowhere.

We interact with a lot of people who don’t create, or who don’t share what they create, for a lot of reasons. If you fall into this camp, we’d strongly encourage you to think about why not, and if you like, send a message our way and tell us, or use us as guinea pigs to share what you create with a very controlled subset of “everyone.” We’d love to hear from you.

For us, once we’ve healed enough to want to create again, the “why not” is always fear – the same fear we see over and over as the core fear of everyone, the fear of being alone somehow. Bruises are just a hurt-reminder of that fear, whispering that maybe it’s really true, that fear that we’re alone…maybe it’s really true.

It’s not true. We promise. Life maybe has sucked, life maybe still sucks, but creation lets you deal with that. And actually dealing with stuff will leave you (has left us) much less alone.

The Human Scar of Exile

The Human Scar of Exile

In the course of getting ourselves kicked out of church we started to see a pattern of behavior. We referenced it briefly in the All the Problems of the World… post, where we said:

We’ve written about, and will write more about, this topic – but the summary is, people think that if someone near them is doing behavior X, it will cause them pain. They think that if someone near them is misbehaving according to God, then they will feel pain from God as a result.

This is an old, old cultural scar. Homophobia, racism, legalism, basically all kinds of hatred are examples of this. It’s a lie that people believe and respond to: “I need to control you, or something bad will happen to me. I need you to be what I think God wants, or we won’t be safe.

We’ve gone over and over the ground of how people try to keep themselves safe. We even know part of why people do this – because of the one fear, the fear of being alone because of who you truly are. We do crazy, damaging things trying to keep ourselves and our relationships safe – and we do crazy, damaging things trying to make the people around us into our definition of safe as a result.

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Children’s Faith and Houses of Cards

Children’s Faith and Houses of Cards

At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”

He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.” (Matthew 18:1-5)

Children

lolz

We were talking about this Bible verse, because we do that thanks to the magic of an app that spits out a Bible verse every day. Laine mentioned how this seemed legit, because children really are interesting and uncommon in their faith.

“That’s why kids are curious, and why they accept new information so easily. They don’t assume they’re right about…much.”
– Laine

And…children are pretty flexible. It’s true. They’re very sure about the world, but also they approach it knowing that they probably don’t understand it. Their only job is to learn, for at least the first 14-16 years. And since they change almost daily, they learn how to adapt simply in order to…wake up every day. This has the effect of them being very sure about the world – until something tells them to change.

Adults

“Adults go all hear-no-evil because their houses of cards are confused by new input.”
– Laine again

Adults build houses of cards based on the things they think keep them safe. Layer upon layer of flimsy, and foundations built on shifting sand. These houses of cards, despite being wobbly by nature, are rigid. They have to be held perfectly still, because if you even breathe too hard on a house of cards…the whole thing topples. So adults hold their breath, and they by and large tread lightly. People with house-of-cards models hate hearing things that disagree with their view of the world  – which is unfortunate, because reality, and God, very often throw new information at us. Often this information is beautiful, if only we can manage to avoid running away from it long enough to allow it in.

God is going to force change, and growth. Not a single one of us is perfect or fully formed, and we do stupid things that hurt ourselves in the name of self-protection. God protects us from ourselves, and that means sometimes we have to change even if we don’t want to – and that means that not a single one of us can actually stay perfectly still or hold our breath for any length of time.

We can fight against the wind or we can go where it takes us – but either way, a house of cards won’t survive.

Conflict, too, is necessary for change and growth. It’s necessary for the growth of each of us, and it’s also necessary for the growth of the relationships we try to stumble through while we lug our baggage along behind us. The houses of cards that represent our relationships are even more elaborate – and even more fragile.

Adapt

At some point, children grow up. They start to get their own scars and their own baggage, and they start building models of reality that don’t hurt as much as actual reality. The begin to build the house of cards, and they lose all of the flex that makes them able to have the kind of faith that can bend without collapsing at the slightest breeze.

You gotta’ keep some flex in your models.

Some things are certain. But really, “certain” just means it takes a whole lot to convince someone otherwise. God, for example, exists. He exists, and he is good, and he cares about each of us individually. That’s certain. But…actually, that just means that we’re really really sure, because there’s a lot of evidence and we’ve been over that ground a lot.

Other things, like  “OpenShift is the best Kubernetes platform,” eh. Maybe we should be open to new information about that, and maybe not being certain about it would be beneficial. Maybe it’s the best for some people, or even most people – and maybe it doesn’t work at all sometimes.

You have to have a foundation that’s built on things that are real – not cards precariously stacked. And…on top of that foundation, you gotta’ keep some flex in your models. You gotta’ be open to being wrong. You have to allow for wind, and breath, and change. The alternative is ignoring reality, and ignoring God, and that’s a dangerous path to go down.

All the Problems of the World…

All the Problems of the World…

As we observe the drama and problems of the world, and also our own drama and problems, we’ve come to the conclusion that most of people’s problems come down to…pretty simple solutions.

All the problems of the world can generally be solved by:

  • have boundaries
  • you can only control you
  • don’t be afraid
  • trust God and each other – but mostly, and first, God
  • enjoy what you have in your life

So…yeah. These are pretty simple. They’re also insanely hard to do. But they seem to be helpful, so we’ll explain what we mean.

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Most of Succeeding at Life is About Being Able to Deal with Rejection

Most of Succeeding at Life is About Being Able to Deal with Rejection

Succeeding at Life

Succeeding at life is being shiny – living, sure and certain, in your purpose that God gave you as best as you currently understand it, and letting your soul shine. Letting the joy of being you flow out of yourself and everything you do. This is hard to do, and it’s hard to maintain. It’s difficult, and it’s complicated, but it really comes down to two things:

  1. Doing what you’re supposed to do
  2. Not being afraid of rejection for being yourself

If you have both of those going on, in our experience, you’ll have a lot of joy, and a lot of fun. You’ll attract people who like your vibe, and you’ll have an impact in the ways you’re supposed to.

Your vibe attracts your tribe.
Sassy Chocolate

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“I’d Rather Reign in Hell” and Related Thoughts

“I’d Rather Reign in Hell” and Related Thoughts

We all have good parts of our lives: fun events, good friends, adventures, trying new experiences. We all have bad parts too – deaths of people we love, arguments that end relationships, work disappointments.

In my life, I have had some amazing experiences and some really low lows.

Recently, however, I’ve noticed that something seemed to be broken with how I experienced the good in my life. Even really great things, I didn’t enjoy. I didn’t really notice until I could experience them normally again, but it was like I went numb. I would notice that I couldn’t taste my favorite food, or a delicious cigar…and I would wonder, what is going on?

I realized, some good things are so Big Good that it’s actually hard for me to process them. I get scared…and then I hide from the good. This is super annoying actually, and double bad, because it prevents me from both enjoying the good and also being thankful for the good.

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Why Thanos is the Best Avenger

Why Thanos is the Best Avenger

We’re (hopefully) taught some important things as children:

  • you can do anything you set your mind to, so aim high
  • we’re all representatives of humanity, and being part of humanity comes with some responsibilities – vote, take care of the environment, take care of each other, etc
  • do what you think is right, even if all your friends are doing what you think is wrong

[Spoilers ahead, for Avengers: Infinity War and Avengers: Endgame]

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